As Demanded: AWordOn Children, Cricket, and Bukkake

“They've seen me make decisions, they've seen me under trying times, they've seen me weep, they've seen me laugh, they've seen me hug. And they know who I am, and I believe they're comfortable with the fact that they know I'm not going to shift principles or shift positions based upon polls” (G. W. Bush)

When Alex created this poll for me I didn't know what to think, or expect. But I certainly didn't think I'd be expected to write about kids, a “sport”, and a sexual act all in one post. *sigh*. So what do Children, Cricket, and Bukkake all have in common? Education! (lol) But, seriously, that's how I'm gonna tie them together. First, though, let's be clear about what we're talking about.

Children: Pretty straight forward. We all used to be (and maybe still are) kids. Kids are stupid, unruly, and trouble. Really, I'm against spawning. But people, sometimes by choice and sometimes by whoops-I-slipped-and-stuck-my-penis-in-your-vagina (i.e. “accident”), do it.

Cricket: A game (ahem, sorry, a “sport”) played by silly people who demand on stopping the event for a tea break. Cricket games, I've surmised, can go on for a few minutes (e.g. backyard cricket) or, like, almost a week (e.g. test matches). I've also noticed that this game is a strange slower version of baseball. And the refs wear funny hats. And wave their hands in funny motions. Oh, and they chuck the ball in some sort of a bizarre overhead motion where you keep your elbow locked. That's about the gist of it.

Bukkake: See here. (WARNING: for adults only! Underage folks, the faint of heart, and those wishing to protect their virgin eyes... let's just say bukkake is a activity involving consenting adults, where a few religious/morally upstanding members of the community gives daisies and donuts to another member of the community (consensually).

The rearing of children is of paramount importance. Without a proper upbringing kids might grow up to be socialist, Maoists, or, dare I say, hippies. (Gasp!) Enter education. Kids have to be taught stuff. That's the role of parents as well as the community. The contributions that can be offered by people other than parents can be divided into 2 discussion: appropriate content; and appropriate methodology. Let's start with the latter.

Clearly, I'm not going to be able to cover all the bases here, but I am capable of saying this: interactions of the sporting variety are an excellent way for kids to learn essential socialization skills. Even when playing a ridiculous game like cricket. Other sports will better promote physical fitness, but that's not the only important thing; which is why cricket has a role. Ultimately, it doesn't matter what they do so long as it's a structured interactive environment through which they are able to learn how to work as a part of a team and interact with others. Unfortunately what kids get out of playing cricket (and the like) is achieved indirectly; that's unfortunate because those potential gains are often missed by shortsighted people. And you get things like this happening.

Now what about appropriate content? What should kids be taught? Well even though Alex will probably accuse me of being a conservative, I'm not sure kids (or anyone) should be taught about bukkake. I mean, come on. Bukkake, more than anything, is a byproduct of the pornography industry's need to come up with new and “exciting” things. This happens because a key attraction of pornography is its taboo allure. While this creates a tug-of-war with pornography's ambition for social acceptance, it also means pornography has to push the limits - what's old hat or commonplace fails to stay taboo. So what happens is the eroticisation of everything by pornography: some thing, or act, is presented as that which should arouse. Through this we get strange things like bukkake, armpit sex, and (the infamous) 2girls1cup. [Again, virgins and people who want to stay innocent, avert your eyes!] What's the educational value in that? Well, probably nothing. BUT, a vibrant pornography industry also gives us alternate approaches to sex education. Here I don't mean the teaching of STI awareness or how to properly use a condom. Here I mean how to be good in the sack. For instance, thanks to the porn industry, we can all learn how to give great manual pleasure. (bootleg it here!). Which is more useful in a hands on (pun!) kind of way than the tired and antiquated Karma Sutra. While the appropriate age at which a child should learn how to be a good lover is a separate issue, a culture that stifles the consumption of pornography is going to make it harder for people to learn how to please their partners effectively – something I think we can all appreciate.

So while I've managed to write the filthiest AwordOnFailure post ever, I've managed to cover that which I needed to for the schizophrenic poll. At the end of the day, all I'm trying to say is that the education of our kids is important if we want them to grow up and be proper. This involves an open mind: not only when it comes to the means by which they learn, but also what they learn. I could say more, but I think that’s enough for now. This is just my spur-of-the-moment thoughts on the subject. I could be wrong. After all, what do I know.